In The Heat Of The Moment
by AJeff
Summary: You will never know what you will do in the heat of the moment, we sometimes do or say things we may later regret. Post IOTH
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own "The Pretender"**

**You will never know what you will do in the heat of the moment, we sometimes do or say things we may later regret.**

**_"The wonderful thing about life, Miss Parker, is if you change the story, the ending is up to you."_ **

Perplexed and naked, Jarod laid in puzzlement. The chill air breezed through an opening crack from his bedroom window. Lies had been fed into his life for as long as he could remember. Suddenly, he felt trapped and a feeling of suffocation came over him. As a victim of the corrupted organization,"The Centre" was to be blamed.

His chocolate browns tried to envision the final moments with Miss Parker as he stared through the darkness. Never having bothered to have slipped on a pair of shorts after his shower, Jarod sprawled himself on the mattress. He kicked his sheet down to the foot of the bed. A bit longer than it had been in Scotland, he pushed his hair back away from his forehead, deeply he let out a long agonizing sigh.

The scent of her perfume lingered in his head. After the Isle of Carthis, he felt betrayed. "What about us?"

It had been six months since he's had any contact with her.

She had done her crying mostly in the rain or in the shower under the sprays of water. How could she have treated her best friend the way she had. Reminiscing back to that painful scene in the limousine, handcuffed like a common criminal, she pulled away as he took hold of her hands, as a last minute gesture of their friendship, tossing him aside like a bag of garbage.

There were shattered glass on her bedroom floor. Seven years of bad luck. Miss Parker laughed. A chain of bad luck was nothing new to her. She knelt down and carefully picked up the pieces of her silver hand mirror which she deliberately threw down in anger. If only it would have been so easy to have picked up the bits and pieces of her heart, and to throw it aside for a brand new one. Unaware of having pricked her finger, blood dripped onto the carpet, only then had she felt the stinging sensation. Her finger bled like her heart. Her tantalizing sapphire-colored eyes were hidden by the redness of her constant weeping.

Turning off the lights, she stepped out of her designer outfit, and sat on her rocker, dressed only in her delicate laced underwear. She pulled up her legs to her chest, wrapping her arms around them. She gazed out of the window, with the combined look of annoyance and despair, the scenic view were gloomy shades of black like the inside of her house and soul.

Sitting in darkness, Miss Parker tapped her polished red nails on the arm of her chair. She sighed gently, and traced the outline of her pursed lips. Everything which had been done to Jarod, his captivity, the tortures, her treatment of him, which caused him much pain and sorrows was finally eating up inside of her.

All alone in a new life, there had been no reason to return back to "The Centre". After all, "daddy" was somewhere probably in the bottom of the ocean. Or whomever that old man was to her. Even if the decrepit Raines was truly her father, there would have been no way in hell would she have ever acknowledged him as "daddy" or let alone a member of her dysfunctional family.

Jarod had clearly kept his distance away from her, and coming out of seclusion was nowhere in the future. Having gone through many turmoils in his life, which had unfortunately begun as a young child, now a grown man, nothing seemed to have changed at all. His demons were still inside of him, and no matter how much he had wanted to rid them from his past and pain, he couldn't. Miss Parker was one pain he forever could not vanquish out of his life.

She knew if there were to be any sort of reunion with her "pretender", the first step would have to come from her. Her closed fist slowly opened, a piece of crumbled paper fell down onto the floor, a paper she's had for four months with a telephone number scribbled on it. It was Jarod's number, which she knew from memory.

Miss Parker would never admit to anyone on just how lonely she was. Jarod had always been in her life. What would life be without him? You never how much you'll miss a person until they are gone. He was gone.

Heading into the bathroom, she splashed water onto her face. Her reflection in the mirror was someone other than herself. Instead of the heartless, icy cold Miss Parker everyone knew, she was just a pathetic woman drowning in her own sorrows. She suffered from headaches, when in actuality, it was her heart that ached.

Ignoring the ringing of his telephone, Jarod placed a pillow over his head. After several rings it stopped, a minute later the ringing continued. In his darkened room, he grabbed his cell phone off of the night stand and flipped it open.

"Hello," he said hoarsely.

"Jarod," said the throaty voice.

"Miss Parker." He hadn't sounded surprise by her telephone call. "I see you still have your ways of tracking me down."

"How are you?"

"I was fine, until now."

"I haven't heard from you in such a long time."

"Are you drunk?" He asked sarcastically. "You don't sound like the Miss Parker I know."

"It's me. And I'm not drunk," she answered softly.

There was silence. His breath was the only sound which could be heard.

"Hello?"

"What?" He answered.

"Thought you hung up."

"What's the nature of this call?" He sighed.

"Still doing your pretends? Or have you settled down on one profession?"

"Did you call for a chit chat? Because I really don't feel like chit chatting, Miss Parker."

"You're angry."

"I'm glad you're aware of it. I remember Scotland. You turned on me."

She blurted out. "Jarod, what about us? Ocee's place." Her mind wandered of that night of the storm, alone together.

"Ocee's place? Let me think. Nothing happened."

"About that night, I, yes, I wanted to feel," she tried to explain, but, Jarod interrupted.

"Parker, don't. There was a time I wanted nothing but to have us kiss, wishing that Ocee had never stepped into the room with that damned pot of tea, but, she did us a favor. Like you said, a moment of weakness, that's all it was. It would have complicated things. And in the end, you betrayed me anyway. Or have you forgotten? Just leave me alone, why don't you, and forget this part of our lives. Start a new beginning. Don't stop me from starting mine."

"We've been through a lot together, you and me, from when we were kids, for as long as I can remember..."

"Parker, maybe we both deserve something more. And the something more I'm waiting for won't be you."

"I gave you nothing but grief. "The Centre", my brother, my father, I mean, I don't really know who he was to me, I'm sorry for what we've caused you, Jar."

"Is there a reason for this call, Miss Parker?"

Closing her eyes, she bit her lower lip, then spoke. "Do you remember my first name?"

"Yes."

"What is it?"

"Why? Have you forgotten your own name?"

"No. Just wondered if you..."

"What is it that you want, Miss Parker?"

"I-I'm sorry for everything. Forgive me."

"Not this time. No, not this time. You've hurt me enough. I won't allow it anymore. Look, I was just on my way out. And I'm running late. Is there anything else?" He asked as he stretched back onto his bed.

"Hope you find what you're looking for, Jarod."

"I hope so."

"So, this is goodbye. For good," she said painfully.

"I believe so."

"What am I suppose to do, Jar?"

"You're a smart woman, you'll think of something to do with your life. It's just that I won't be in it. I don't want to be in it. Not anymore."

"I sure messed up. Didn't I, Jarod?

"Yes. Big time, Miss Parker. Didn't you ever think I had any feelings at all? It doesn't matter now, I've already let go of whatever there was between us, if there ever was anything. It's time to move on."

"Moving on to what? Where?"

"Time to go, Miss Parker. Take care of yourself. Too bad it had to come to this."

"Jarod." She called out his name in a whisper.

There was a deafening sound of silence on the end of her telephone line.

**JMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMP**

Miss Parker stood on the cliff overlooking the ocean, the night was wet, cold and windy. She thought back of the events in her life. "The Centre" had come between them. Jarod had been so unfeeling toward her in their telephone conversation. Sitting down on the rocks, she cried. The weather had suddenly changed, raining heavily. Pulling her coat tightly around her, she ran her hands up and down her arms for warmth.

"You planning on jumping?" A voice asked.

She acknowledged by shaking her head.

"You do realize it's pouring out here," he said. "You'll catch a cold."

"I could say the same to you. Catching a cold is the least of my worries," she said.

"Why are you here?"

"Nowhere else to go." Looking up, she stared at him.

"I told you, Miss Parker, I needed to move on. I'm not going to even ask how you found me." Jarod held his hand out to her. "Come on. Let's get out of the rain."

**TBC - Chapter**


	2. Chapter 2

Miss Parker walked out of Jarod's bathroom as she towel dried her hair. Dressed in his oversized sweatshirt, she joined him as he lit the fireplace.

"Nice shirt," he remarked.

"Hope you don't mind, mine was all wet."

"I just poured you a cup of coffee," he pointed to the table. "It will keep you warm."

She sipped her coffee and quietly watched him move about throughout his house. He looked out the window for several seconds and clearly saw the reflection of his former "huntress" through the glass, walk toward him. Jarod turned suddenly, Miss Parker stopped.

"The rain's just about dying down. You should leave soon."

"Jarod, aren't you going to even ask me why I was so close to your house?"

"No. I really don't care. Just saw a woman on the cliff, and being the helpful "pretender" I've always been," he snickered, "thought I'd check to see if she needn't help. I didn't know it was you."

"And if you did, you wouldn't have come out."

Jarod kept silent.

"I guess the answer's yes."

Still, he kept quiet.

"Jarod, we need to talk."

"There's nothing to say. I've already said my piece."

"You've always been a part of my life, Jarod. I'm sorry I treated you cruelly. I wish I could take back everything I've done to you, everything I've said to you." A teardrop slid down her cheek.

He sighed, raking his fingers through his long locks. "Don't waste your breath."

"Jarod. You're...you're so cold toward me. Please don't be."

"This coming from the "ice queen". Don't make me laugh," he said, walking pass her.

Miss Parker grabbed his arm in an effort to get his attention.

"What, Parker?" He voice was low-toned.

"I'm sorry."

"It's not going to change anything. What's done is done. Can't reverse time. Can't pretend "The Centre" never existed. Can't pretend you never existed, but, I wish I could."

As he stood before her, he watched her reaction coldly. Instead of stepping away from him, Miss Parker caressed his cheek. Jarod closed his eyes just for a moment. Gently, taking hold of her hand, he pushed it away from his face.

"Don't, Miss Parker. Don't," Jarod said. "It's too late for anything."

Ignoring his words, she tugged at his hair. "You need a haircut." Taking hold of his jacket, she slowly pulled him into her. Their faces were just an inch away as they felt each other's breaths against their skin. Her lips barely brushed his, when Jarod stepped back.

"I said don't. What part don't you understand?"

"Why not?" Her blue eyes glimmered with hope, anticipating the feeling of his lips on hers.

"Why? Because, Miss Parker, if I let this kiss happen, I won't be able to stop."

"Would it be so wrong?" Again, she caressed his face.

"Yes, so very wrong." He stepped away and picked her mug off of the table and stuck his finger into it. "Your coffee's getting cold." he said blankly.

"The Centre" won't be in the way," she persisted.

"What are you trying to say, Parker. Now you want a life with me. Is that it?"

"Yes, I do, Jarod."

"No more "you run, I chase". No more "huntress" and "prey". No more nothing, but, just you and me?" Softly, he spoke.

She smiled. "Yes."

"Whatever I felt about you, I've suddenly changed my mind, my heart. Every time I look at you, I'll think of "The Centre". You're a reminder of everything in my life I wished that wasn't. I'm sorry. I'm so very sorry. Enough was said and done, and not once were you ever on my side. Wait. I could count on one hand when we'd join forces. But, then it was back to the old routine of our "cat and mouse" game. I hated the way I was treated, tortured by everyone of your family and especially by you."

Miss Parker felt her heart collapse and her body weaken. "I know. I know. I'm sorry. What do you want me to do? I just want to put everything behind us. I want to be friends again or more."

"What are we, like ten again? As we grew older, somehow you stopped being a friend to me. How can I erase everything that's happened? Tell me how?"

"I don't know."

"I must say, Miss Parker, I'm surprised neither one of us are yelling at this point." He looked out of the window. "Hey, look. The rain stopped. You should leave now."

"Leave? You want me to really leave? That's it? Nothing more to us?"

"That's it."

"Jarod. I don't know what to say. I don't want to leave. I've never really had a home with anyone. But, I know now, I want one with you."

"Just go, Parker," he pointed to the door. "Maybe I can start a new life now. I'm sorry it had to come to this."

Walking to the door, she stopped. "If you let me leave, walk out the door, I'll never bother you again. I won't be back."

"Wait," he said. Jarod walked to her. Miss Parker held her breath.

"Excuse me. Let me get the door for you," he said.

**TBC - Chapter 3**


	3. Chapter 3

Miss Parker stood frozen as Jarod held the front door wide open. She brought her hands to her chest, and held on to her aching heart.

"There's nothing more to say, Parker." Jarod rubbed his eyes. "I'm tired," he said, holding the door open. "Oh, and keep the sweatshirt. And I'll mail your wet one back to you."

"Jarod." Hurt and confused, she whispered his name. "You don't even want any reminders of me in your home."

"I'm really trying to be civil between us. I don't want to argue. The less said, the better, Miss Parker."

"I prefer you yell. What did I do so wrong? Here I want to make amends and you..."

"And I what?" He held his anger in, crossing his hands in front of him. "Tell me how you're going to make everything all right. Things you've said, hurtful things will somehow evaporate into thin air, and how you're going to make it better? Make me forget the many sins of your father. Tell me how are you going to do that?"

"You don't understand, Jarod."

"What did you do so wrong, you ask? You took orders from "The Centre", from your father. Or should I say fathers. Take your pick, whoever is your father."

"You don't understand," again, she said.

"Yes, I don't understand. And I'm not about to even try. So, like I said, don't waste your breath and leave before I really get angry."

"You've always forgiven me in the past. At least I thought so."

"I had put aside that you'd come to your senses and we'd still be friends. You would come around. Well, I may be a genius, but, I sure didn't have any common sense when it came to you. But, that was once upon a time, Miss Parker. Once upon a time. This turning point won't have a very happy ending. Not what you're looking for."

"I can't force you to forgive me," she said sadly.

"No, you can't. You know what's strange? We seemed to have switched roles. I'm not the forgiving person you thought I was. I'm the heartless one now."

"What did happen to your heart, Jarod?" She asked, as she walked closer to the front door.

He laughed. "I left it in Scotland. And since when have you grown a heart, Parker? I've pretended to be a doctor several times, and one can never grow a heart. So, this is a miracle."

Silence stood between them. It was in that moment, he had regretted his cruel remark. But, he said nothing more. Instead, Jarod's cold dark eyes penetrated through her.

"Sometimes what you're looking for is right in front of you, Jar. Don't make the mistake of letting it go."

"You were never mine to let go. I belonged to "The Centre". Just like you."

**TBC - Chapter 4**

**Author's note: I do apologize that this is such a short chapter. This conversation echoed in my head all day. Chapter 4 will definitely will be longer.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note: To my anonymous reviewer, Nancy. Thank you. Your words on your latest review were just "perfect" and you said it better than I could have ever worded it myself.**

Miss Parker stood inches from Jarod. "This is utterly painful as if we have switched bodies. I don't know what it is going to make to "make the world right" again for us, but, we are at a desperate crossroads. I hope that there is a definite and positive turning point coming. But, by the look on your face, maybe not."

Jarod thought of the what if's in store for them. He quickly weighed the good and the bad. The latter outweighed the good, which he pretty much knew it would. He hadn't moved at first. Lost in her gaze, the feeling of rejection and emptiness captured her face. A sudden sadness hit him. Anger ran though his body of the many times she had a role of the cruelty which was set upon him. He stepped aside.

"The world is not a happy ever after much of the time, Parker. Even if it is, someone always dies in the end, eventually."

Miss Parker stayed in her place. "Do you hate me that much that you can't forgive me? You want me to walk out the door?"

"Please leave."

"Tell me you hate me, then, I'll leave. Look me straight into my eyes and tell me that you hate me." She inched closer to him.

The veins on the side of his neck protruded out. "Get out!" Jarod yelled.

"Does it make you feel any better pretending you don't care?" She stroked his face.

"Get out!" Again, he yelled.

"I've loved you always, Jar, always will." Her voice cracked.

"Goodbye, Miss Parker."

It was raining lightly as she walked passed him. She stopped, turned for a brief moment, then continued walking. No matter how hard she tried to imagine his face, he was now faceless in her mind. Her heart ached of loneliness.

Jarod watched her until her svelte figure faded into the distance. He mouthed "I love you". Closing the door, he leaned against it. Slowly, he slid down onto the floor and cried.

**JMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMP**

The next few weeks past. It was harder each day for Miss Parker. She brought his sweatshirt to her nose, and closed her eyes, trying to remember his scent against her skin. Folding it carefully, she laid it on her bed, next to her, wishing it was him instead of a piece of material to keep her warm.

Jarod's eyes filled with laughter and joy. He finally found happiness, belonging in her heart. There were promises of the future for him and his love, a future he thought would never happen. He held her tenderly, interlocking his fingers with hers. Kissing her neck, she giggled. His mouth moved down to hers which muffled her soft laugh. Miss Parker hung on to him tightly, for fear of letting him go, he'd be gone. They were happy, finally.

She was awakened by the sound of her alarm clock. Pushing her dark shoulder length hair away from her face, confused and dazed, she laid sprawled on her bed. Realizing it was only a dream, she grabbed her pillow, crying painfully into it. After several minutes, she dragged herself out of bed and into the bathroom.

Wrapping a towel around herself, she opened her dresser, and pulled out a pair of jeans and black tee-shirt. There was no color in her life, only darkness, which suited her attire perfectly. A facade on her face hid her true feelings, she pasted a smile and walked out of the house.

**JMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMPJMP**

Jarod parked his car in front of his house. Taking a deep breath, he squeezed the steering wheel tightly before exiting out of the car. His dark eyes coldly burned into her baby blues. "Thought I got rid of you."

"Thought maybe you somehow changed your mind," Miss Parker had hoped. "Have you?" She watched the seriousness of his eyes.

"If I had, Parker, I would have been the one at your place. Nothing's changed." His eyes moved slowly outlining her face, stopping at her eyes, then her mouth. "I said nothing's changed."

The sound of his car door shutting loudly caused Miss Parker to jump.

"Sorry," he mumbled.

"How are you, Jarod?"

"What do you want, Parker? You shouldn't have come back. You're making it harder...look, go away."

Miss Parker followed Jarod's footsteps as he headed to his house. "You're not invited in," he told her as he stuck his key in the keyhole.

"I didn't ask to come in. We can talk out here."

Reluctantly, Jarod agreed, sitting himself on the step. Looking at nothing in particular, he stared into the open space. Miss Parker joined him, but, stayed a short distance away from him.

"I know I've failed you in many ways."

"If I had known when I first met you how our fate would be like, I wouldn't have kept up the friendship we formed at "The Centre". You went away, then came back and joined forces with them. What did I ever do to you?"

"I'm sorry. It's just that daddy..."

"Everything you've done was for daddy. You never questioned him about anything. Never doubted him. You were daddy's little girl."

"He was my father. Or, at least I thought he was."

"Yes, right, Angel."

"Don't ever call me that," she snarled.

Jarod turned to Miss Parker. "Even when they killed Thomas, you went on believing...you could have walked away then. Was daddy that important to you still? You knew what they were capable of doing, yet, you still went on your hunting spree chasing me. I'm guessing you never cared if they killed me, too. And on the island, well, let's not go there. I was lucky, I escaped. The poor guy, Thomas didn't know what hit him. I'll always be looking behind my back, making sure no one's around to plug a bullet into me. Because of you, Parker, I don't think I'll ever be able to find true happiness. I wouldn't know it if it looked at me straight in the eyes."

"For someone who didn't want to talk, you sure have a lot to say."

"That day I let you walk out the door, I almost called out to you not to leave, maybe there might be hope for us, but, I couldn't take the chance of being hurt and betrayed again. I can only take so much. My head ruled over my heart. And it still does."

"I'm so very sorry for everything. All those years, grief and sorrow I bestowed upon you, I'm sorry. But, I promise you, I won't ever hurt you again or betray you," she said sincerely.

"Somehow you do seem sincere, so believable."

"It is. I am. I don't know what else to say except I love you."

"Don't say that! There's nothing more, Parker. Just take care of yourself. I had imagined us several times of being together, but, seeing what the cards had laid out for us, our fate, not in this lifetime. Or any other lifetime."

"Jarod, please don't say that. There's still hope, isn't there?"

He shook his head. "Hope for what? Us? No. I can never promise you anything."

"You've made me cry, you've made me worried and I missed you. I never meant for you to have been my enemy." She moved in closer to him, and laid her hand atop of his.

Jarod reacted to her touch, and quickly pulled away. "But, you are my enemy." He corrected himself. "You were. And I can never forgive you for that." Standing up, he dusted his jeans.

"Jarod!" Miss Parker cried out, pulling herself up. "You can't end our relationship like this!"

"If my love could hold you. If only it could. Damned it, Parker! You want me to say I love you, too? There was nothing between us other than "The Centre"! Leave me alone!"

"You're cutting me out of your life?" Her voice trembled.

"All these months, I relived that scene of ours at Ocee's, the scene that almost happened, continuously in my head. But, then, my thoughts are darkened by another scene, the one of me being handcuffed in the limousine. You were the "ice queen" all over again. You didn't care how much you hurt me. You made me out like some sort of inanimate object constantly kicking me around, having no feelings, being of no use to you." He felt his temperature slowly rise to a boiling point.

"I'm sorry."

"It's easy to walk away. Watch me! I'll do it first! Now leave me alone! You're nothing but a traitor! I can never trust you! Ever!" Jarod hollered, and walked into the house, slamming the door shut, leaving Miss Parker alone on his doorstep.

**TBC - Chapter 5**


	5. Chapter 5

"Stop running, Jarod and face what you feel. You prefer to do what looks like the right thing to do, instead of doing what is the right thing to do." Parker yelled.

"What?" He yelled back from behind his closed door.

"I said, you prefer to do what looks like the right thing to do, instead of doing what is the right thing to do!"

He flung the door wide open. "I heard you the first time! The whole neighborhood heard you! Get in!" Jarod hollered, pulling her into the house.

Miss Parker placed her hands on her hips. "Where have you been?"

"Excuse me?" His dark browns glared at her. "I don't answer to you! What I do in my personal life is none of your business!"

"I came by several times, but, I'm guessing you weren't home. So, what pretend are you on now?"

"No pretend. Just needed to get some things in order."

"I tried calling. I've also left messages. You seemed to have disappeared."

"I'm here. Haven't disappeared. What do you want now, Miss Parker? I thought we've settled our differences."

"Nothing was ever settled, Jarod. Where were you?"

"So many questions," he laughed. "I needed to get away from you!" He shouted.

"Why? Do I drive you crazy? Is that it?" She screamed.

"Yes! Yes, you do! Let me put it in simple words! I can't be with you!"

"Can't or won't, Jarod!"

"What difference does it make? We can't be together!" Jarod glanced at his wristwatch.

"Waiting for someone?" She sneered.

"Look, Parker. We have to move on, to step forward. Put one foot in front of the other. I thought it would be hard to let go, but, it's not. Try it."

"What, Jarod? Life goes on? And on and on? You're abandoning me? After what we've been through together! A whole lifetime together! I was mistaken! It's you I want!"

"Me? Now you want me? Where were you in that limousine? You showed your true colors. I'm trying so hard, so very hard not to yell. But, you can't seem to get it through that thick skull of yours that..."

"That what? You want nothing to do with me? Is that it? I'd be someone out of your past. To be forgotten!"

"Yes! Yes! Now you get the picture!"

"I've never given up hope for us. After Carthis," she began, but, was so rudely interrupted.

"After Carthis, after Carthis, after Carthis! I'm sick and tired of hearing about Carthis, what might have happened, what could have happened, what should have happened! Well, nothing happened! And it's never going to happen!"

Again, Jarod looked at his wristwatch.

"Why do you keep looking at your watch? Am I keeping you from something?" Miss Parker snarled, fluffing her hair away from her face.

Standing before her, Jarod kept silent.

"Or someone?" She held her breath waiting for her world to crash. "Is that it? Is there?"

"Just leave, Parker." His voice softened.

"Fuck you, Jarod!"

"There you go swearing again. You don't always get to have your way. You call this love, Parker?"

"I've got to get out of here!" She screamed at him.

"Finally! It's about time! Smartest thing you've said in a long while!" He shot out as she walked out the door. "And don't ever come back!"

No matter how strong Miss Parker had pretended to be all their lives, she couldn't fool herself regarding her feelings for him. Her game of "pretend" was just that, a pretend of not loving him on the outside. In the privacy of her own home, she was not only alone, but, also lonely for his love.

**TBC - Chapter 6**


	6. Chapter 6

"Drinking's bad for your ulcer."

Miss Parker heard a familiar voice as the sound of footsteps entered her living area. The only light came from the glow of the fireplace which illuminated the room.

Gulping down her drink, she got up from her sitting position and poured herself another, glancing over at her 3:00am visitor. "What? Are your fingers broken? Can't pick up the phone to call me? It's been a week," she snapped, waving her glass into the air.

"I said drinking's bad for your ulcers." He grabbed hold of her glass and laid it down on the table.

"Why the hell do you care? Loosen up, Jarod. Join me in a drink," she purred.

"No, thank you. Drinking blurs your thoughts."

"So, why are you here? I'm out of your life. Isn't that what you wanted?" Daggers escaped out of her icy blues.

Jarod cleared his throat. "It's only fair that I explain to you about me, about things. I didn't like the way we had our last visit with each other. We're friends, Parker."

"Friends? I wasn't welcomed in your house. I clearly remember that you didn't want anything to do with me. And now you're here. And why do you just walk in here? I could charge you with with trespassing."

"But, you won't. Parker, I didn't like the ending we had. I didn't want us parting as enemies. I'm sorry I yelled. But, you can't force someone to be with you."

She shrugged. "Okay, I'm not forcing you to be with me. You've made that clear weeks ago."

"Parker."

Picking up her glass, she threw it against the wall and screamed. "What? What do you want? I know you don't want me in your life! Any idiot knows you've moved on! So, you came by to rub that into my face?"

"No. I just need to explain, for you to understand..."

"Understand what? That you're fucking someone on a nightly basis! I don't need for you to come tell me the gory details!"

"Parker, stop. I haven't had a good night's rest since you left."

The "ice queen" clapped her hands. "Bravo! The "pretender" has feelings!"

"Could we just sit and talk a bit? I want to be honest with you." He gently took hold of her arm.

She jerked her arm away. "I prefer to stand. Honest about what? I'm not begging to be with you anymore. You got your wish. I'm out of your life completely. See how easy it was? You told me to walk away. Well, I tried it! And by golly it worked! So, get out, Jarod!"

"Turning points only come when you have something to turn to."

"That's just how the damn story goes, Jarod."

"We each need our turning point."

"I know what you're trying to say. You go your own way and I go my way! Whatever the hell it may be! I never meant nothing to you. Is that it? Look! Shit! First you tell me to leave you alone and now you're here! For what? You don't care about me!"

"You don't understand. I do love you, Parker, I always will, you were my first love."

"I hear a "but" coming." She circled around him.

"I will always be there for you in your darkest moment, but, I don't want to hurt you anymore than I already have." Jarod leaned against the mantel place.

"So, just leave, why don't you."

"I came here for a reason, Parker and I'm not leaving until I've said what I needed to say."

Miss Parker rubbed her temples. "I have a headache."

"You shouldn't be drinking at this time of night or should I say morning. Do you want a glass of water and some aspirins?" He asked with great concern.

"Always a gentleman, aren't you, Jar? I don't need any nursemaid and I don't need you!" She brushed a tear away. "The wonderful thing about life is if you change the story, the ending is up to you." Miss Parker stared at his dark chocolates. "And you're here to tell me your story and your ending. Aren't you?"

"You and I, we both deserve something more, but, it wasn't meant to be for us. I'm sorry, Parker, but, that turning point that you wanted to turn to isn't going to be me. And the reason for that is, because when I least expected it, when I felt as though I had nothing to live for anymore due to your cold rejections, a beautiful woman walked into my life.

Miss Parker felt her heart break in two. Her deep blue eyes glistened with sorrow, as tears slid slowly down her face.

"I'm sorry, Parker." He caressed her cheek. "The one I chose to turn to is someone else, several months ago." With a slight smile, he cupped her face in his hands. "I'm sorry."

"No," she whispered, shaking her head. "It's not true. Don't lie to me."

"It was soon after Carthis, I met her, after that last conversation of ours. I still thought about you, but, I could never have a life with you. She made me forget. Then, you came back into my life. I needed to get away, to be with her. You see, you were my fantasy, she's my reality. I love her, Parker. I needed her, but, not the same way I needed you. I needed you to be my friend and only my friend. Nothing more."

Miss Parker moved away from Jarod. Tears continuously dripped down her pale face. "I guess you could say, we're like **two ships passing in the night.**"

"Come here." He pulled her into him.

"No. I'll be alright. I'll be fine." She said, but, lied.

With his fingers, he wiped her teardrops. "I without a shadow of a doubt know that one day you will find your turning point as I have. But, if you need me, if you need a friend to lean on, I will not hesitate to help you out."

She shook her head and stepped back. "No. It wouldn't be fair to her. I won't be in your way of happiness. I'll only be a reminder of the grief I've brought upon you. I won't stand in your way. Does she know about me?"

"Yes. She knows I'm here."

"If I was her, I wouldn't have allowed you to be here."

"She's not you, Parker. She knows we needed closure. Trust is what we have with each other."

"You'd better go, Jarod. The love of your life is waiting for you."

"You were once the love of my life, so very long ago."

"You'll always be my love, Jar. I'm sorry for everything."

"I am, too."

"Right now, I'm just nobody." She put on her mask and smiled. "Hey, you'd better go home to her now."

He approached her, holding his arms out. "Friends are entitled to a hug and a kiss."

"Give her a hug and a kiss. She's the one who deserves it, not me."

"Parker."

"Go home to her, Jarod, your turning point." Walking to the front door, her best friend followed behind. "Goodbye, Jar."

He lightly pecked her on the cheek before she had time to react. "Goodbye, Miss Parker."

Her world crumpled inside of her. Even if she tried, there was no way she could have stopped her tears from gushing out of her baby blues.

He stared at her for a moment, then, wrapped his arms around her. Snaking her arms on his back, she tightened his hold, laying her head on his shoulder. "Don't leave me, Jarod. Please don't." She cried deeply into his chest as tears soaked up his shirt.

"It's too late, Parker. I have to go. Shhh. Hey, I have to go. You'll be alright." He kissed the top of her head. A teardrop fell atop her hair. "You know we have to go our separate ways. I'm so sorry it had to end this way."

"I love you, Jarod."

He still hung on to her. "I know. I know you do. I'll always love you. No one ever forgets their first love. I'll never forget the little girl who gave me my first kiss."

"But, I won't be the one who'll give you your last, Jar."

Jarod tried prying himself away from her. "I've got to go."

"No," she said, twinning her arms around his neck.

"I have to. You know that. Parker, let go. Please."

"No." She wept sorrowfully. "I'm so sorry for everything. What can I do to change your mind? What can I do to make you love me? To love me forever. To never leave me. Everyone I love leaves me eventually. But, I never imagined you would. Please don't."

He leant his forehead on hers, his hands went around her waist. "Parker, don't do this to yourself. Stop it. You'll be alright. Where's the Parker who never fell apart?"

Sobbing convulsively, she spoke in between breaths. "She never existed. This is the Parker you never knew. The one you should have known. The one I hid from everyone, especially from you. You're the one I've always loved. Teach me to stop loving you, because I don't know how. I don't know how to let go."

Pulling away from her slightly, he smiled. Jarod kissed her tenderly, and tasted her salty tears as it fell between their lips. "Goodbye, Miss...goodbye Melissa." Droplets of tears rolled down his face as he walked away.

That early morning he left, she cried for everything that would never be. This was now the beginning of the rest of her life. She blamed no one but herself for the destruction of both of their lives. Not once had she ever imagined Jarod being completely out of her life. She watched painfully as her love walked out the door forever.

Loving Jarod caused her much pain, but, not as much pain as she had caused him. There was nothing else which could have been done. He chose a new "beginning" with someone else. Miss Parker cried sorrowfully as her walls came tumbling down.

**You will never know what you will do in the heat of the moment, we sometimes do or say things we may later regret.**

**"The wonderful thing about life, Miss Parker, is if you change the story, the ending is up to you."**

**The End**

**"Ships that pass in the night, and speak each other in passing;**

**Only a signal shown and a distant voice in the darkness;**

**So on the ocean of life we pass and speak one another,**

**Only a look and a voice; then darkness again and a silence."**

**Henry Wadsworth Longfellow**

**Author's Note: Charro, thanks for your personal email and the words I needed to do this chapter! Well, I did it. I cried writing this. **


End file.
